Banana skin fixtures for the Reds and Chelsea

Having read the rather unfortunate news about John Terry going under the surgeons knife to resolve his back problems I have been running my good eye over the remaining league fixtures for United and The rent boys and I've graded each according to their banana skin potential for either club slipping up. Three bananas represents the highest potential (obviously)

Saturday, 30 December 2006
Bananas League
Man U v Reading, 15:00




Monday, 01 January 2007
Bananas League
Geordies v Man U, 17:15




Sunday, January 2007
Banana Cup
Man U v The Villa, 14:00

Saturday, 13 January 2007
Bananas League
Man U v The Villa, 15:00

Sunday, 21 January 2007
Bananas League
The Arse v Man U, 16:00




Wednesday, 31 January 2007
Bananas League
Man U v Watford, 20:00

Sunday, 04 February 2007
Bananas League
Spurs v Man U, 16:00




Saturday, 10 February 2007
Bananas League
Man U v Charlton, 15:00

Tuesday, 20 February 2007
UEFA Champions League
Lille v Man U, 19:45

Saturday, 24 February 2007
Bananas League
Fulham v Man U, 12:45

Saturday, 03 March 2007
Bananas League
Scousers v Man U, 15:00




Wednesday, 07 March 2007
Bananas Champs League
Man U v Lille, 19:45

Saturday, 17 March 2007
Bananas League
Man U v Wanderers, 15:00
Another season defining game - for Wanderers fans at least.






Saturday, 31 March 2007
Bananas League
Man U v Rovers, 15:00
Unless you are The Arse, Rovers are almost always difficult to beat under the guidance of the man of iron AKA Mark Hughes






Saturday, 07 April 2007
Bananas League
Portsmouth v Man U, 15:00
'Happy Harry' has made a habit of peeing on United's parade.






Tuesday, 10 April 2007
Bananas League
Man U v Sheff Utd, 20:00

Saturday, 14 April 2007
Barclays Premiership
The rent boys v Man U, 15:00




Saturday, 21 April 2007
Bananas League
Man U v Middlesbrough, 15:00
We've slipped up before at home against this crowd






Saturday, 28 April 2007
Bananas League
Toffees v Man U, 12:00
North West rivalry runs deep - the Mickey's haven't forgotten Wayne Rooney's defection - even if they needed the brass





Saturday, 05 May 2007
Bananas League
The Bitters v Man U, 15:00
Reason? City's whole season rests on this fixture - they'd love it if United's did too...





Sunday, 13 May 2007
Bananas League
Man U v West Ham, 15:00


The rent boys's remaining fixtures

Saturday, 30 December 2006
Bananas League
The rent boys v Fulham, 15:00
A London derby alway has the potential for ending up arse over apex



Tuesday, 02 January 2007
Bananas League
The Villa v The rent boys, 20:00
Without John Terry this could be tricky!






Saturday, 06 January 2007
Bananas Cup
The rent boys v Macclesfield, 15:00

Wednesday, 10 January 2007
Carling Cup
Wycombe v The rent boys, 20:00


Saturday, 13 January 2007
Bananas League
The rent boys v Wigan, 15:00


Saturday, 20 January 2007
Bananas League
Scousers v The rent boys, 12:45
Nothing needs adding






Tuesday, 23 January 2007
Fizzy Pop Cup
The rent boys v Wycombe, 19:45


Wednesday, 31 January 2007
Bananas League
The rent boys v Rovers, 19:45
Hughes remains a big Red...





Saturday, 03 February 2007
Bananas League
Charlton v The rent boys, 15:00


Saturday, 10 February 2007
Bananas League
The rent boys v Middlesbrough, 15:00


Wednesday, 21 February 2007
Banana Champs League
FC Porto v The rent boys, 19:45


Saturday, 24 February 2007
Bananas League
The Bitters v The rent boys, 15:00
You never know what City will do..but would they do United a favour?



Saturday, 03 March 2007
Bananas League
Portsmouth v The rent boys, 15:00


Tuesday, 06 March 2007
Banana Champs League
The rent boys v FC Porto (agg 0-0), 19:45

Saturday, 17 March 2007
Bananas League
The rent boys v Sheff Utd, 15:00

Saturday, 31 March 2007
Bananas League
Watford v The rent boys, 15:00

Saturday, 07 April 2007
Bananas League
The rent boys v Spurs, 15:00



Monday, 09 April 2007
Bananas League
Hammers v The rent boys, 15:00
The Hammers could be fighting for survival






Saturday, 14 April 2007
Bananas League
The rent boys v Man U, 15:00




Saturday, 21 April 2007
Bananas League
Geordies v The rent boys, 15:00
Never easy - Owen could even back for the Mags..






Saturday, 28 April 2007
Bananas League
The rent boys v Wanderers, 15:00
Big Sam could put a big banana skin under Jose et al




Saturday, 05 May 2007
Bananas League

The Arse v The rent boys, 15:00
Sweaty palms time



Sunday, 13 May 2007
Bananas League
The rent boys v Toffees, 15:00
Moyes wont give anything to Jose - he's matey with Fergie




United have a banana skin factor of 25 while The rent boys's is only 23, but of course United have to face The rent boys which is itself is a banana skin x 3 game, added to which United have a better goal difference and a four point lead at this juncture. United have slightly tougher looking fixtures hence higher banana skin factor - however Terry's back problem somewhat evens out the potential for slip-ups. At this point I'm giving United the title by one point.